So Similar, yet So Different
by SeaSpectre160
Summary: While on Earth-X, Sara is struck by how similar Citizen Cold is to the man who wore his face on her Earth.


**Just a little bit of speculation for the upcoming crossover based on the summary and leaked set photos, so likely to be totally AU by the time the crossover actually happens. On the one hand, I psyched to have some version of Len back – and one who's on the Legends' side, too! On the other hand, I'm also bummed because this is supposed to be Wentworth Miller's final appearance on Arrowverse :(. But I'm glad that at least his final appearance isn't one where he's trying to kill his future friends (okay, so this is an alternate version who may have never had his own Legends… details, details…). That being said, if the writers decide to be evil by killing this one off or having him turn out to be evil… I'll be pissed. Because I wouldn't put it past them.**

 **I'm also looking forward to the first TRUE four-part crossover. Anyone who's read my rants in the Author's Notes of 'The Cold Factor' and 'The Earth-1 Factor' knows what I'm talking about. Oh, and I'm glad that Alex is finally getting involved in crossover stuff (remember, she was elsewhere during 'World's Finest' and stayed on Earth-38 for 'Invasion!' and 'Duet').It appears that Curtis and Rene will also be taking on a bigger role, as well. But John/Spartan's absence is concerning.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I don't own Legends of Tomorrow or any of the Arrowverse shows.**

 **WORD COUNT: 2152**

* * *

To say it had been a shock was an understatement.

Even after what had happened in 1916, even after hearing Barry's explanations of how people who were dead on their Earth could have living doppelgängers on another, the Legends had been completely unprepared to walk into the Freedom Fighters' base on Earth-X and find an identical copy of their fallen teammate.

Oh, there were a few differences; small ones. She doesn't think _their_ Leonard would have been so open in his own shock at seeing Mick alive and well (apparently, it had been the other way around, here, with Earth-X Mick having died saving _his_ life). He had always kept a hard, cold mask up over his emotions.

But other than that, he's so disturbingly like the man they lost that it's almost physically painful. She can easily see the Leonard Snart that she knew plotting with the heroes of this Earth, because for all his disdain for heroics, Leonard would pick them over Nazis any day.

The reactions of the Earth-1 and Earth-38 heroes are varied. Those who actually knew Leonard all have this look on their faces, like they've been punched in the gut, every time they look at him. Kara and her friends are mostly confused until it's explained to them, but it doesn't really change their opinions of _this_ Leonard – Citizen Cold – all that much. Kara keeps giving all of Leonard's friends sad looks all the time, though, like she wishes she could do _something_ to make their sorrow go away. Maybe hugs. Lots and lots of hugs.

Others are… less accepting of the story. Oliver is naturally untrusting, as usual, and the fact that his doppelgänger in this world is evil means that the Freedom Fighters are wary of trusting him to begin with, and the general mistrust is feeding a vicious cycle that someone should probably stop before it all blows up. Barry and Kara are facing similar hostilities, but at least they're making more of an effort to be _liked_ , or at least trusted.

Nate and Amaya… well, they've only met the Leonard Snart who was working with the Legion, so they're less inclined to feel comfortable in Citizen Cold's presence. And poor Zari is sort of caught in the middle, hearing _very_ different stories from her various teammates and not really sure what to make of it all.

As for Sara herself…

She's a bit confused. Just like she was when she first saw him in France 1916, she's flashing back to when she last saw him, and to the conversation before that. The unresolved… feelings that came from those moments are rising to the surface once more. And it's frustrating as hell. His words echo through her head, carefully chosen, cautiously broaching the subject of the future… "for me… and you… and me and you."

Her own rejection – or challenge – she isn't sure, even now – is there, as well: "You wanna steal a kiss from me, Leonard? You'd better be one hell of a thief."

But instead, she was the one to steal that kiss, right before he lost the chance to steal one himself.

So yes, there is only so much she can take of plotting and planning with him in the room – sitting so close that their elbows were almost brushing – before she has to get up and excuse herself. She's pretty sure no one buys her excuse of needing to go to the bathroom, but nobody challenges her, either. She just needs some space to breathe and process her thoughts for a while.

But apparently, being a bit of an ass is another thing that this Leonard has in common with theirs, because less than three minutes later, he comes and finds her in her 'hiding place' on the roof.

"You know, this isn't the safest place to be, even at night. Or maybe _especially_ at night."

Sara closes her eyes and sighs. It's _so easy_ to fool herself into thinking this is the same crook she once traveled with on a flying time ship. But it isn't him. And forcing herself to remember that _every damn time_ isn't making her feel any better.

"Seriously, if someone shoots you off the roof, I'm not saving you."

The comment brings an ironic smile to her face in spite of that. "Been there, done that. Don't worry, I don't feel like being dead _again_."

"Come again?" She hears the crunch of gravel under his boots as he moves closer. God, even the way he _walks_ sounds familiar!

"I've already been shot off a roof. Cracked my skull open on the ground below it, too, and was dead and buried for a year."

She looks up after he goes a few seconds without responding, and sees him staring at her, with that calculating look on his face, like he's trying to figure out if she's messing with him or not. It's so similar, and yet so different at the same time, because…

"He took that better than you did." The words are out of her mouth by the time she realises she's speaking aloud. But of course it's too late to take them back, so she turns away and focuses determinedly on the smog-filled horizon.

"You're talking about him," he says after a short bout of further silence, "The Leonard Snart from your Earth."

"Yeah. I told him our first day on the _Waverider_. We had just boarded, and he started walking with me and making a rather transparent attempt at conversation. I asked him why he was talking with _me_ , and he said it was because I was the only one on our newly-formed team who wasn't, and I quote 'a genius or a reincarnated freak-show'. I told him I was dead for a year, and he didn't even blink. He just kept on trying to flirt with me and sneak looks at my ass."

He chuckles. "Can't blame him for that," he mutters, and she's not sure if she was supposed to hear him or not.

"There was a lot about me he just… accepted without much thought. I was different, then. Being resurrected came with a rather nasty side-effect of Bloodlust, an urge to kill. Don't worry, I've dealt with that a long time ago. But one time… the events leading up to it are rather complicated, but the important thing was that I was going to kill Stein. He'd been captured by the enemy, and he was key to their plans, and I was told by Rip – our old captain – that if I couldn't rescue him, I had to make sure they couldn't use him."

"You were ordered to kill your own teammate." And yes, there's more than a hint of the disgust that has always made her cringe.

"I didn't want to. But the fate of my home and my family was on the line, and between that and the Bloodlust… I was going to do it. But Len talked me down. And he didn't do it simply for Stein's sake. He knew that I wanted to be better, to get past the Bloodlust. He appealed to that, instead. He didn't just care about a teammate being killed, he cared about what having that blood on my hands would do to me. Some people might have just dismissed me as a monster… but he didn't."

He's quiet for a bit. "You two were close…" It comes out sounding a bit like a question.

"We were friends," she admits, "Which, for him, was _not_ easy."

"Just friends?"

And damn, now she wishes she could stab him for bringing _that_ up. But there's no malice or teasing in his tone. "Just friends. We could've been more, maybe. I don't know. He died before we had the chance to find out." A bitter laugh forced its way out of her throat. "No, that's a lie. We _did_ have the chance – plenty of chances. We just sucked at feelings – both of us – and danced around it until it was too late. There was flirty banter, some actual heart-to-heart conversations here and there, and something that Mick _insists_ on calling 'eye sex'… but nothing involving actually talking about _us_ , and what we might be. Now we'll never know."

He's quiet again. A long silence drifts by, and a breeze chills them. It isn't nearly as cold, but Sara can just imagine that if she leans back a little farther, she'll feel the cold, metal wall of the engine room, where she and Leonard once huddled together for warmth when they were locked inside. Where he, in a shocking display of chivalry that he insisted on calling mere practicality, gave her his jacket in defence against the cold.

"I wish I knew her."

Sara looks over at him, as he stares out into nothing. "Who?"

"You. The Sara Lance of this Earth."

Sara's a little surprised. Not once has her own doppelgänger been mentioned since she got here.

"She was everything the Reich liked; pretty, blonde, blue-eyed…"

"Ah, yes, the superior Aryan Race."

"Yeah. And on the surface, you'd think she – and her family – believed in it, too. Her father was an officer in the SS, and everything. But we didn't find out until it was too late… Her parents were hiding a Jewish family in their basement. 'Sub-human criminals', in the eyes of the Reich. They were trying to help them escape, but they had no connections to help them get the family – the Regan's – to a safe place. The SS found them and had them all executed on the street – well, except for the Regan's son, Rory. He escaped, and found us. Told us the whole story, of how Sara and her whole family risked their lives for him and his parents."

Sara hums. "She sounds brave."

"I'm sure she was. If we'd known about her family, I'm sure we could've helped… could've saved them."

Sara smiles sadly. "We can't save everyone; I've already learned that the hard way. Agonizing about what you could or couldn't have done differently isn't going to bring them back; trust me on that one."

He seems to be thinking hard about what he says next before he actually says it: "Did you ever think about… about him like that? Wonder about what you could've done? Even if there really was nothing else…"

And for a moment, Sara's back to wanting to stab him. But instead she decides to answer him. "All the time. I was the last one to see him alive. I know you were told the basics – the Oculus, why we needed to blow it up, Leonard knocking Mick out to take his place…"

"I would've done the same for my Mick in a heartbeat."

"I know. And I would've done the same for Leonard. The problem was that I was the only other person there, and _someone_ had to get Mick out of there. If I'd knocked Leonard out, I'd have two unconscious men just lying there, and all three of us would have died. And there's no way I could've convinced Leonard to willingly let me take his place. So…" She takes a breath before continuing. "I kissed him. Once. And then I picked Mick up and dragged him out of there. That was my only choice."

She brushes away a surprise tear. Until now, she thought she'd already shed every tear she had for the thief. Apparently that's not the case.

He sighs. "That's… I don't know what I'd do in that situation. But…" He stares at her, making direct eye contact. "I don't believe he'd think any less of you for the choice you had to make."

Sara nods. "I know. That doesn't make the pain go away, but it does make it easier." She sighs. "We should probably get back inside. The other's will probably send someone to look for us, soon."

"Huh? Oh, right."

They both stand up, brushing gravel off themselves before turning and walking towards the roof door.

"Thank you." Sara figures she should say it before someone does come looking for them. "For listening. I know you're not him, but… talking to his face one more time… it helped."

He actually smiles at her, something she never even saw from her Leonard. "Anytime."

THE END

* * *

 **Now, 'The Cold Factor' is still going pretty slowly. I've gotten a bunch of new responsibilities in one job, and am finally starting my second one (it's a new company and although I signed on with them back in August, they've been getting their online teaching system online and working out the bugs). So my free time has been diminished (but yay, more money!).**

 **I have also been working on another, smaller Legends fic, unrelated to 'Long Way Home', to be released in December. It is a tribute to a tragic historical event that had a great impact on my family. I started writing it before S3 started, so it's basically AU from that point on (for starters, there's no Zari). It's actually done, but I'm still going to wait until December to post, specifically the 100th anniversary of this event.**

 **Now, some people have asked, a long time ago and more recently, if I'm going to adapt S3 like I did with 'The Cold Factor'. The answer is… sort of. I do plan to have an altered version of S3, but the project will be _much_ smaller than 'The Cold Factor'. It's been about a year since I started working on that, and it's still not done, so as much as I've loved writing it, I'm not putting myself through such a big project again. I'm thinking a series of episode tags, set after the end of each episode, with flashbacks when I have a canon scene I want to completely re-write. So writing Earth-1 Len interacting with Earth-X Len should be… interesting. And there _will_ be a separate wedding fic, specifically the one that's been up on my profile for over a year: 'Vegas'. Yes, I do intend to get that up relatively soon. It will have to take all the pre-Christmas episodes of Arrowverse into account (mainly Legends and Arrow), so that's one reason why it's not done yet.**


End file.
